52 Questions in 52 Weeks: 6 of 52

Have any of your family members died? If so, explain what they died from and what you remember of their death; the circumstances of their death.

Eric - There have been two deaths in the family that made a significant impression on me.

My grandma Pat (Patricia Johnson Troff) died on November 15, 1996. She died after battling cancer. Her death was one of the saddest moments of my life. I loved her so much. She was such a sweet, loving person. In her obituary, my family wrote: "All who knew her loved her. She was noted for her quiet kindnesses and consideration for all around her. Her unconditional love for others was her legacy to children and friends. All children who came near her and especially her grandchildren will remember her "Do you know what?" game. She would always say in response to their "What?" "I love you." Her death came at a particularly trying time in my life. When she passed away I lost a great source of love and support.

I have many wonderful, treasured memories of my grandma Pat. My family was blessed to live with her for an extended period, shortly before she passed away. It is such a blessing because I got to spend a lot of extra time with her. I remember she was a great cook. She would often bake fresh bread. She would let me pick out sprinkles to put on top of the roll she made just for me. When the rolls came out of the oven she would give me my warm, sweet roll to eat.

I remember that around the time of her death I did everything I could to hang onto her. I decided my favorite color was purple because that was her favorite and I just wanted to be like her. I also remember in the backyard there were lilac bushes, which she loved. To this day every time I see a lilac bush, I think about my grandma Pat. Or whenever I hear the song, "Whenever I hear the song of a bird, Or look at the blue, blue sky, Whenever I feel the rain on my face, Or the wind as it rushes by, Whenever I touch a velvet rose, Or walk by our lilac tree, I'm glad that I live in this beautiful world
Heav'nly Father created for me." it brings me to tears as I think of my grandma.

When I turned eight my mom gave me a very special gift. It is a letter that my grandma Pat wrote to me on the day I was born. I wish she could have been there to give it to me herself. It is a treasured possession. In the letter, she shares with me some special experiences and thoughts she had visiting the temple. The letter also contains her testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I am so grateful for her testimony and her love. I cannot wait until the day that I will get to see her again.

My great-grandma, Opal Irene Troff, passed away on March 5, 2000. In 1998 she broke her hip on her way out of the church. After breaking her hip she needed to be moved into a nursing home. Over the next couple of years, her health deteriorated. She couldn't see very well and it seems like her memory and hearing also went. Eventually, her body gave out and she returned to her Heavenly Father.

My family moved into my grandpa's house, in part, to help take care of my grandma Opal. At that point in her life, she struggled to live on her own. She loved to cook, and was an amazing baker throughout her life. For many years she operated a cafe in Ledyard, Iowa. She continued to cook when she lived in Utah. She made the most amazing pies and desserts. She was always independent and as her sight worsened she continued to try to cook, sometimes not using the best ingredients. We would often eat meals with grandma Opal and sometimes my mom would have to warn us to not eat certain things she made. I also remember that she loved to watch The Price is Right and she would have to turn the TV way up so that she could hear it.

After she was moved into the rest home we would go pretty much every week to visit her. It was hard. We watched her worsen and it was almost a comfort when she passed because she no longer had to deal with the pain and suffering.

Alison - I had several grandparents when I was growing up. The first death I remember was my great-grandpa Hiatt. He died when I was 5, so I don't remember very much about him. I do remember his viewing and funeral because it was the first funeral I went to. I also remember the night he died my parents went to the hospital to see him and my Mom was really upset, which was hard for me to understand.

My Alder great-grandparents died when I was 10 and 11. Both of these grandparents had Alzheimer's, but they were really delightful people. My parents have often referred to them as salt-of-the-earth people because they were so incredibly kind. We used to go visit them when we went to Ephraim. My grandma Eunice would tell my grandpa to go get cookies for us, and they were always oatmeal-raisin cookies from the freezer, so they were really cold. My grandparents would bring them up to our dance recitals when I was really little, so they were pretty involved in our lives. My great-grandpa died first. I went with my parents to the hospital to see him right before he died and it was pretty traumatic. I remember I just cried when I saw him. When he went to the hospital, my parents said it might have been the first time my grandparents spent a night apart in their entire marriage - so incredible.

After my grandpa Ivan died, my grandma moved to a nursing home. I went with my grandparents to do Thanksgiving there one year. She kept calling me Debbie and I just went with it. She died almost a year to the day after my grandpa died. I think she just couldn't live without him. They really were wonderful people.

My great-grandma Hiatt lived to be nearly 100. She died when I was in high school. Growing up, we always went to her birthday parties. I remember not really liking a lot of them, but my Dad told me that when someone is having a 95th birthday party, you just show up. There were a lot of relatives there that I didn't know. My mom used to always make me and my siblings share our talents in the talent show. I hated it. Kristin and I typically played duets on the piano. My great-grandma was so nice and happy to see us. She grew up in the depression and was a farmer's wife, so she had a difficult life. However, she was always really happy every time I saw her.

My grandpa Vail died when I was 18. I think his death hit me the hardest of all the deaths I've experienced.  He was such a nice person and such a great-grandpa. He always called me m'dear. He was an alcoholic for a lot of his life. However, when my dad went on his mission, he encouraged his parents to go to the temple every week. My grandpa agreed, and eventually going to the temple became a part of his life. He and my grandma went to the temple every week and eventually he was the first counselor in the Manti Temple Presidency. My grandpa is living proof to me that the atonement is real and overcomes everything. When I think of my grandpa, I instinctively think of the Temple. The Manti Temple does live endowment sessions, so my grandpa had the entire Endowment memorized. My aunt told me that when my cousin, Blake, went through the temple the first time my grandparents were the ordinance workers reciting the endowment. My grandpa was so excited to share the endowment with my cousin, that he forgot to first share the endowment with his wife.

My grandpa was one of the first investors in Ensign, the DMS my dad started. My grandpa was often Satan in the endowment, and so when he gave my Dad a check to start the business, he told my Dad that he made a deal with the devil. My grandpa was a very successful farmer. He was very entrepreneurial in the way he ran his farm and was able to make a lot of money. He would go to the cattle auctions often and would send his cows to Kansas. My grandpa valued hard work. When I grew up, there was an understanding that laziness would not be tolerated. I can definitely tell that value came from my grandpa. He worked really hard and expected everyone else to work hard too. He had 6 sons, so they all went to work on the farm when they were young and learned how to work hard. That translated down to me when I first went to work when I was in high school. My dad told me that you had to work an honest day for an honest day's pay.

My grandma Colleen died in 2013. I was devastated when she died. She was so kind and wonderful. She really loved her family. My grandma loved animals. After my grandpa died a stray cat kept coming around to her house and she started feeding the cat. Turns out the cat was pregnant and soon gave birth to kittens. My grandma helped find homes for the kittens. She found a lot of comfort in that cat. When she moved into a nursing home the cat became a stray again but stayed close to the house. My dad went on the deer hunt one year and the cat was hanging around the house, so he brought her home.

My grandma was an amazing seamstress. I remember her showing me some of the quilts she made when she was younger, and they were beautiful. She lost her sight when she aged, but even when she was blind, she would still knit. I have a beautiful blanket that she knitted for me and gave me for my wedding. My grandma loved Eric. Eric went to Snow College for a semester before his mission, so when I went to visit him, we would always go see my Grandma. She was in town the weekend Eric gave his missionary farewell talk, so she came to his farewell. After his talk, she gave him a check for $100.  I couldn't believe it. She had only met Eric a few times, but she said she felt like it was the right thing to do. After Eric came home and we got married, my grandma had Alzheimer's and didn't always remember her grandkids. However, even when her Alzheimer's was taking her sweet memory, she told me once that she always liked Eric from when she gave him the $100 check. She remembered Eric almost until the end.

Eric and I used to visit my grandma when he was at Snow College. We would always take her to dinner somewhere, and she would pay for it. She loved it when we came and visited. My parents made her a book of photos on Shutterfly. There was a picture of my grandpa behind a pulpit, and she told me that she was so proud of my grandpa for changing his life. She really was the best. She died 3 weeks before little Skylee was born. I've always felt that she was taking care of Skylee before she came to earth. I find a lot of comfort in going to her grave every year on Memorial Day with Skylee Dallas.

My grandma was amazing with genealogy. My dad told me that she was doing genealogy when it was hard. She would go up to BYU's library when my Dad was at BYU to do genealogy and see my parents. When she died there were boxes full of names that she had found and done work for. I used to go to the Manti Temple and do baptisms with her name. When genealogy went digital on computers, she bought a computer and would spend a lot of time finding people. My dad said she took to a computer like a duck to water. She truly had the spirit of Elijah.

I am very blessed to have wonderful grandparents in my life. When my grandma died, one of my parent's neighbors told me that God gives us memories so we have roses in November. Although grandparents are so hard to lose, they are so wonderful to have.